Okay, I had this finished for days, but I wanted to wait for alias_chick, I wanted to post this when she had watched the episode. Which is silly, because 1. it's not like the review will vanish after some days and 2. everyone knows not to click spoilery links.


1x02 The Blind Banker

Hey, the museum is Doctor Who's Platform One! It's a real place, isn't it? I was sure it's a set.
Aw, museum guy is crushing on museum girl.

John vs. a machine in a shop while there's Sherlock vs. a guy with a sword in 221B.
Ooh, the mirror above the fireplace is shiny. It wasn't last time.

"You had a row with a machine?" - "Sort of. It sat there and I shouted abuse." I don't even know why I love it so much, but I do.
Oh, so John can just use Sherlock's card. Does that mean he knows the PIN already? But what if a signature is required instead? Can he fake Sherlock's signature?
Sherlock is hiding the sword, he's hiding that there was a fight. But why? Heh, John finds the scratch in the kitchen table.

"Is that my computer?" - "Of course." - "What?" - "Mine was in the bedroom." LOLWUT, lazy bastard. Is guessing people's passwords really that easy? Or is John's password really that simple? And what is it? I want to know! Because I can't think of anything.
Ha, I like how John just takes back his laptop when Sherlock was in the middle of writing an e-mail.

"Yes, when you said we were going to the bank..." ^^

Well, obviously Sherlock and Sebastion didn't get along too well. The way Sherlock says "friend" when he introduces John, I'm pretty sure it means something like "Ha, see, I can have friends! There are people who like me!". John ruins that victory a bit by saying "colleague".
"... we hated it." Oh my god, look at Sherlock's face! He's only pretending that he doesn't care what people think of him (well, okay, in some cases he probably really doesn't care), but here you can see clearly how at first he's annoyed and then he's a bit sad. Aw! I wish I could give him a hug!
"and this freak would know you'd been shagging the previous night." Right, so Sherlock seems to have trouble keeping his observations to himself. And here I want to go back to "It wasn't me that upset her, Mycroft!". So what if Sherlock noticed that Daddy Holmes had been cheating on Mummy Holmes? So Daddy would have been the one who actually upset Mummy. But maybe Mummy chose to ignore that, but then Sherlock decided to inform her (or a room full of guests maybe) of what was going on.

And there we have the blind banker. I don't remember how long it took me to realize that the episode is called that because the portrait has a line sprayed over the eyes, but I remember that I still didn't know after the first time I watched it.

You know, I never noticed that John stands in this military way all the time, but now I keep seeing it. It's fascinating. And a bit depressing, because it's shows me once again how very unobservant I am.
"I don't need an incentive, Sebastian." Haha, John's face there. Seriously, Sherlock! People need money to survive! How does Sherlock survive, by the way? Do people pay him anyway, even if he'd work for free?
Ahaha, John's reaction to seeing the amount of money on the check.

Ooh, now it's the symbols flying in the air. This show is so shiny! ♥
Whoa, that downward pan isn't good for my fear of heights.

Haha, just moved in. If Sherlock wanted to lie his way into my building, he could just do it, even though I've lived here for 2 years now. I only know what the person in the apartment next to mine looks like.
Holy shit, Sherlock possesses acting skills. "You want me to buzz you in?" - "Yeah. And can I use your balcony?" Hahaha! It's unlikely, though, that I'd let a stranger use my balcony.

Judging by Sherlock's face, he isn't used to dealing with DIs who aren't Lestrade. Personally I don't like it either that Lestrade isn't there.

Pff, just because someone is lefthanded doesn't mean they do everything with the left hand. I mean, there are things that Sherlock listed there that could have nothing to do with being lefthanded (like the power socket thing - if I did that, it would probably be because of the left to right thing, not because I'm lefthanded). Yeah, I know, I should just ignore that. Some things shouldn't be questioned, suspension of disbelieve.
Guys, do me a favor. If I'm ever found with a bullet wound in the left side of my head, go and find the murderer. Also, I don't have a gun, so that would be suspicious, too.

Ooh, that round room, I've seen it in Doctor Who (the Silence in the Library two-parter)!

"Anything else you can do?" - "I learned the clarinet at school."
Looks like that job interview went well. :oD

"I said could you pass me a pen." - "What, when?" - "About an hour ago." Oh, Sherlock, you sloth. How did he manage without John? Did he have flatmates before?
Oh my god, look at that! It's so amazing because Sherlock didn't. John threw the pen and Sherlock caught it without looking, that was cool. I should stop rewinding, really.

Are you trying to tell me that guy sprayed that without a stencil? Because I'm not believing it.
Dammit, John, why didn't you run? Probably not used to running from the police.

"They're giving me an ASBO!" Hee. The delivery of that is absolutely awesome. I'm sorry for John, though. But shouldn't they be able to tell that John didn't spray? I think there'd be paint on his hands like GSR. No? Too much effort for an ASBO?
I love how John is about to get out of his jacket, but Sherlock puts it back on and shoves John out of the door.
I don't think I would take a taxi for some time if I had just had a case with a murdering taxidriver.

Is it weird that I'm wondering what happened to John's food? Sherlock just wanders over to Soo Lin's apartment and John follows. I'm guessing he didn't take the rest of the food with him. Did he at least pay? Or did he pay when he ordered?

Canned children's laughter. Hate, hate, hate. Just heard it too many times. Can't someone record more?
And again after breaking into someone's apartment Sherlock doesn't let John in. And this time he pays for it. Ha. And possibly for saying that breathing is boring, haha.
"Oh, I'm Sherlock Holmes and I always work alone, because no one else can compete with my massive intellect!" XD

I like how Sherlock sounds so hoarse then. But he's not saying what just happened. Why?

And 38 minutes in we're finally seeing what scared Soo Lin so much right before the opening sequence. I mean, we could have guessed it by now, but it's nice that it's finally shown.

I want the soundtrack to be released, dammit!

You know how people keep finding things and then show someone, but by that time it's already gone and you wish they had taken a photo or something? Yay for John! Oh god, that spinning is hilarious.
Did John's phone just make that sound a Gameboy makes when you switch it on? XD

This museum is not only Doctor Who's Platform One, that Silurian place (from that two-parter where the boy was a Sherlock Holmes fan, hehe), the Library, but also the museum from the S5 finale :oD. And I think it was seen in the van Gogh episode. This episode is so full of Doctor Who locations, hee.

"Some of those skulls are over 200,000 years old, have a bit of respect!" hehe. Ooh, the shooting does stop. "Thank you." ^^

"(SPEAKS CHINESE)" Argh, that isn't helpful, subtitles, give a translation! I wanna know what she says, even if it's not that interesting.

"I don't eat when I'm working, digesting slows me down." And the big question is: what exactly is "when I'm working"? I mean, does that mean a whole case from start to finish or during the day? You know, that maybe he eats in the evening when he's done with the case for the day. Hey, I know post-lunch laziness is annoying, but he wouldn't go days without eating, would he? Because you can't tell me that this isn't also something that slows down.
Oh, Sherlock, I love you, but you're a manipulative bastard. Which I find really not cool. Aw, look at how adorable he looks at Molly when he asks her for a favor. He totally knows she's crushing on him and he shamelessly uses that. And why is Molly letting him? Come on, she must notice that he's only not being an ass to her when he wants something. By the way, that piece of music is for me like the Sherlock equivalent of Supernatural's Brothers's Theme.

Aw, John is sleeping at work. And it looks like Sarah didn't wake him. And she didn't fire him either. Yay! "sort of book event", hehe. Aw, look at the flirting!

"Actually I've got a date." - "What?" - "When two people who like each other go out and have fun?" - "That's what I was suggesting." - "No, it wasn't." I'll have to side with Sherlock on this one. John hasn't specified what sort of fun, so.
"Thanks, but I don't come to you for dating advice." Smart decision.

LOL, next scene and actually John did accept Sherlock's advice.
Haha, Sherlock crashing John's date.
"while I'm trying to get off with Sarah! ... Heeeeyyy." Hahaha.

The bird spider, o hai. Hey, that's pretty cool.

When dudette comes into the dressing room she totally would have heard the noise from the coat hangers.
Oh look, it's the spray paint. I wondered why Sherlock tests it on the mirror, but obviously that was so he could see the movement behind him. Sherlock uses the paint as a weapon - fuck yeah, prop fights! I like how the soundtrack mixes here, the Chinese-y music vs. the other music.
John joins the fight. And look who's following! I like Sarah. :oD

Hee, is that smugness on Sherlock's face when Dimmock says that Lestrade seems to think Sherlock's advice is worth something?

I find Sherlock's annoyance at Sarah being there a bit adorable. Aw, come on, she isn't getting in the way. "Oh, right. Yeah, well, of course I should've known that." hehe.
Yay, helpful Mrs. Hudson!
Yay, more helpful Sarah! But I wonder when Soo Lin had the time to start translating the code. Wasn't she hiding for most of the time?

Aw, German tourists. You know out of what I would have gotten a real kick? Actual Germans (OMFG, if you need volunteers with no acting experience at all, I'd totally come over!!!). I only understand half of what those people are saying. But hey, at least the subtitles don't say "(SPEAKS GERMAN)". Would anyone like translations into English?
"Minut!" That's neither the right pronunciation nor word/sentence. Imma let you finish, Sherlock, but Jack Bauer did the best German of all time. OF ALL TIME! He even got an accent (Swiss, I think) in. It was awesome! But dammit, I can't remember when that happened. Last season probably.

Meanwhile John and Sarah are being adorable.

Oh shit, Sherlock comes home (That all just happened behind his back, dammit!) and there's the 15 1 on the windows. Wonderfully scary. Reminds me so much of the Dark Mark in Harry Potter.

Hey, it's the tunnel from The Doctor's Daughter!
Ooh, really cool how all those things came together and make it look as if John is Sherlock.

Sherlock to the rescue! But not before he's getting strangled again (He really must have pissed off the universe with his breathing is boring comment!). Oh, I love it to see characters I like in life-threatening situations.
Soooo... why didn't Sarah just knock over her chair? I like to believe that the chair was screwed to a board or something, so that it wasn't possible.
John, by doing just one thing, manages not only to save Sarah but also to kill a bad guy and with that save Sherlock. How awesome is that?!
And look how nice Sherlock is being with Sarah! Poor Sarah.

But it's okay, next scene she's already grinning. At a crime scene. Hehe. And is she wearing a shock blanket?
"I go where you point me." Ha, one case and Sherlock trained the new DI.

Holy shit, solving the case is worth 20,000 Pounds. Nice, Sherlock and John won't have to worry for a while about not getting paid.
"Nail a plank across the window and all your problems are over." I should put that on one of those advice meme pics. XD
Aw, Amanda's reaction to the 9 million. And Sherlock's reaction to her reaction. ^^

That shot of London... do I hear bees there?

Heh, and now John is wearing a black and white striped sweater.
John watches someone spray something and I guess that's our paranoia scene. Like when you have, say, a story about scary statues that aren't actually statues (but actually scary) and at the end of the episode there's a montage of seemingly harmless statues. Ah, Blink ♥. THEY'RE STILL OUT THERE. Only that here I don't care and don't really see why I should.

Ooh, look, it's M. Hi, Moriarty! Nice to see you, even if we don't actually see you. I like how we can't see the shot, but we hear it.